Tag Archives: returning to work

God, I need a job

There was an article in one of the weekend papers written by a mother floundering about, not knowing what the hell to do with herself now her children are at school. Apart from the fact that she made a throwaway remark about cashmere bring-and-buy sales, from which I deduced, with Sherlock-Holmesian perspicacity, that her children are at private school, I identified with her. I’ve spent seven or eight months since my daughter started full-time school flapping around like babygro on a washing line. With no structure to my day, I’m paralysed by uncertainty – should I mop the floor, volunteer for the PTA, make my children a nutritious casserole or phone people I used to work with five years ago so they can remind me there’s a recession on, and anyway there’s a queue of younger, fresher candidates outside their door a mile long? Hmmm, what’ll it be? Casserole! No, humiliating phone calls! No, PTA! Ooh, look – it’s 3.30pm already.
Anyway, the article also included some advice from some American expert who’s written a book about women returning to the workplace. You know, the usual stuff about spinning the skills you’ve learnt during your career break to make them attractive to employers – if you’ve been secretary of the PTA you’ve acquired budgeting skills, if you’ve juggled a busy family schedule you’re a time-management whizz, and so on. Apparently, if you’ve spent two or three years arguing with a toddler about why he should put on his shoes, your negotiating skills are automatically on a par with Ban Ki-moons. So by that reckoning, if I should ever land a job with a top-tier commercial company, it’ll be OK to conclude my meetings with potential Japanese investors with ‘Why should you come on board? BECAUSE I SAID SO, THAT’S WHY!!!’



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