What I’ve been doing for the last seven months. In haiku


Toad leaps. Fish gapes. Heron darts.

I lie on the sofa and eat Minstrels

Apathy has me in his grasp.

I’d struggle,

but I can’t quite be arsed

Peas or beans? Peas or beans?


There. I’ve actually made a decision


We make strange bedfellows, Apathy and I.

He snores, and
I dribble.

I wonder if I’ve got S.A.D.?

Everything’s an effort, even…

Apathy has gone too far.

He has suggested

a threesome with Sloth


Mount Fuji looms above my window.

That’s weird.

I’m in Wolverhampton

Just checked – it’s still there.

Maybe it’s time to adjust my medication

April arrives, bringing gentle rain.

My torpor lifts.

My buttocks droop.



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26 responses to “What I’ve been doing for the last seven months. In haiku

  1. !!! Your buttocks might be droopy but boy, your haiku rocks. Between the lines, hope all is well. AND WHERE ARE THE CAPITAL LETTERS??? hugs xxx

  2. Haiku and seasonal courgettes to accompany – brilliant!

  3. Good to see you back. Bet my buttocks droop more than yours.

  4. Oh so very glad you are back. Though my pelvic floor does not agree. And you think you have problems–buttock droop–Ha!

  5. Love it. What precisely IS a Haiku anyway? I know the kids at our school do them, are they like flash-verse or something? Still love it. Esp the buttocks part (ah, uz Breeteesh an’ ze toilet humour).

  6. Love your depiction of the passing seasons, accompanied by a courgette, dahling. Genius. And top haiku. xx

  7. Cherry trees bloom.
    WTF is with Mount Fuji?
    seems it’s lurking through my window too…

  8. Whatever lifted your torpor…..maybe it would work on my flabby bits too….oh TORPOR…I use wine or gin for the lifting of that little baby….

  9. Blighty

    Dahling, loving the haiku and loving the courgette with its seasonal backdrops – sheer genius. Did any one see you fixing up the courgette and its scenery? If so, how did you explain it? (I once got caught winding a hose pipe round a tree and taking photos of it – by a mum dropping her sons off for a playdate – I explained I was pretending it was a snake for my blog – the mum did not seem so sure about leaving her sons with me after that….

  10. Man I’m glad I left you in my blog roll, languishing. x

  11. Your courgette is hardy.

    It lasted three seasons.

    A summer harvest?

  12. So pleased you’re on the go again. With animated veg, to boot.

  13. never saw a haiku illustrated with courgette before. I don’t know whether I was supposed to, but I laughed so much at your droopy buttocks but that peas and beans decision? I get that.

  14. Tried to haiku back
    But couldn’t be fucked. As per.
    My veg don’t inspire.

  15. notwavingbutironing

    Forgive me.
    My reply is late,
    like the last, gentle snows of April.

    Izanagi, the god, braved the underworld.
    But I’ve been to Norfolk.

    Your comments lift my heart.
    Would that they could do the same
    for my buttocks.

  16. Social_Butterfly

    NWBI… I’m so glad that you’re back! It made me sad to click on your page everyday and see that you hadn’t posted! Feeling of relief washed over me when I got the e-mail on my phone to tell me you had updated, unfortunately I was in Italy at the time and had to wait to come home to read… Glad your back Lady!! 😀 xox

    • notwavingbutironing

      Thank you, Butterfly. It’s been lovely catching up with everyone’s blogs, I did miss it. Now all I have to do is get off my arse and post occasionally. x

  17. Well helloo. I’ve got courgettes coming on nicely in the vegetable patch, I knew they were versatile vegetables but this is a whole new league. I am all for sabbaticals, too. xx

  18. How did I miss you’d reappeared? Your courgette looks pretty good to me, and his poetry is fab.

  19. notwavingbutironing

    Yes, he was very versatile. He tasted delicious, too. x

  20. sandy

    C’mon, NotWaiting… are we looking at another seven months here? We’re leaning forward slightly, hand cupped to earhole, looking attentive.

  21. Paul Sanderson

    So where’s Not Waving now? More blogless months have dragged by. Has that Haiku enthusiasm morphed into minimalist blogging? Show us a new courgette at least…

  22. Fantastic – it was worth waiting seven months for!!!! Also good way to use courgettes which really can be bland – unless fried in butter – don’t you think?

  23. Your courgette looks how I feel…..

  24. Lou

    Should’ve seen my buttocks yesterday in a pair of Kwik-Fit style overalls (less of the fit obviously) : Immense.

    Loved the in depth piece with the Capital letters….

    Anthea Turner sends her love.

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